A Day In The Life...

This morning my friend Madelene posted a funny article on her Facebook page. The piece was a woman writing in to a columnist trying to figure out what stay-at-home Moms do all day because she couldn't figure out why her friend was so tired and hard to get a hold of. It got me thinking so I thought I would try my hand at outlining my day for everyone. Here goes:

6:30AM - Here children chattering through monitors. Become conscious enough to determine if they are in pain or dying. No? Great. Turn the monitors off.

7:00AM - Alarm wakes me up. Attempt to shove Raif out of bed and into shower. Stumble upstairs to get kids out of bed. Negotiate and referee which kid gets to bring what book downstairs to watch them at breakfast. Utilize skills learned by watching WWE to get my son into clean underwear and Quinn into a clean diaper.

7:15AM Herd children downstairs and fix breakfast. Attempt to get Quinn to eat her banana. Attempt to get Greyson to drink his yogurt. Referee where the books sit at the breakfast table so they are equally watching each child.

7:30AM Fix Raif's breakfast

7:45AM Wrangle Greyson into his school clothes and pack his backpack for the day. Figure out which of his 600 stuffed animals he wants to take to school.

8:00AM Shove husband and son out the door for school and work. Attempt to help Raif remember his lunch, coffee and computer - usually fail at reminding him.

8:10AM Realize I haven't eaten breakfast - shovel cereal in.

8:15AM Attempt to clean up kitchen but realize that the dishwasher is full and clean from last night. Try to stealthily empty dishwasher without Quinn noticing.

8:16AM Quinn notices the dishwasher being emptied and wants to help.

8:16 to 8:30AM - Help Quinn unload dishwasher. Pray she doesn't cut herself on a knife or drop a bowl. Watch her put everything in the wrong place.

8:30AM - Attempt to load dishwasher with dirty dishes. Try to keep Quinn from taking said dirty dishes out and putting them away.

9:00AM - Herd Quinn upstairs to put on clothes. Rationally discuss why she can't wear sandals in the snow or why light green doesn't go with dark green. Usually fail.

9:15AM Begin reading book of the day.

9:30AM Still reading book of the day.

9:45AM Begin to go insane as I continue to read the book of the day.

10:00 AM Take Quinn downstairs for morning snack.

10:15AM Back upstairs to hopefully do something else than read the f'*%%$in book again. Play doctor, play big bad wolf, do puzzles - whatever she wants to do.

10:45AM Downstairs to start making lunch.

11:00AM Lunch!! Negotiate what is for lunch, how much she has to eat, what glass her milk is in, whether her food in on a plate or in a bowl.

11:30AM - Thank GOD naptime!!! Realize that I haven't showered, brushed my teeth or put real clothes on. Go do all these things so I feel human again.

12:00PM Feed myself.

12:30-2:00PM Try to get stuff accomplished: put all the dishes Quinn put away that morning in their correct spots, pay bills, catch up on correspondence, read the CNN headlines so I am not completely out of the loop on the real world, clean up the kitchen, fill the bird feeders - you get the idea. Try to spend about 20 minutes loving on the dogs so they don't feel left out.

2:00PM - Wake Quinn up, change her and get the family ready to pick Greyson up at school.

2:05PM - Frantically search the house for my cell phone and keys.

2:10PM Call my cell phone because I can't find it.

2:15PM Load up Quinn and the dogs in the car. Negotiate with Quinn as to what toys she may have for the drive.

2:25PM - Get on the highway just as Quinn tells me she has dropped her book and wants me to get it. Attempt to tell her that Mommy turning around to get the book isn't safe and when she stops at a light she will get it.

2:26PM - Turn radio up to obscure screaming about how she wants the book.

2:40PM - Arrive at school and whisk Quinn inside. First adult conversation of the day!!! Talk to teachers about how Greyson did at school.

2:45 - 3:00PM - Attempt to herd two screaming and running children out of the school. Watch preschool teacher walk 10 3 year olds quietly in a line from one classroom to another. Wonder what drugs she has given them and where I can score some.

3:00 to 3:15PM - Get kids in car and negotiate who gets what toy in their seats, who gets in first. Get evil looks from other parents waiting for my parking space.

3:30PM - Turn onto highway just as one of the kids says he/she dropped a toy and wants me to get it. Again discuss how Mommy can't pick up toys while driving 70 on the highway.

3:31PM - Again turn up radio to obscure screaming.

3:45PM - Finally reach a stop light and like a Jedi master get into the back of the car and redistribute toys for the rest of the ride home.

3:46PM - Get honked out by angry drivers when I have sat through half a green light.

4:00PM - Home again!! Try to herd children and dogs into house for snack. Negotiate snack between both of them. Greyson wants peaches. Quinn wants melon. Fix snacks and put them on table. Greyson wants melon too. Sigh. Eat the peaches myself and fix more melon for Greyson.

4:15 PM Attempt to be good Mom and try to do arts and crafts with the kids.

4:30 PM Herd children upstairs to play and referee over who get what toy and for how long.

5:30PM Back downstairs to start dinner. Try to cook dinner, play with kids, referee arguments, stop them from climbing on the table and generally destroying the house.

6:30PM I hear the garage door open. THANK YOU JESUS. A weary Raif enters the house and I give him the "Entertain your children now" look. He herds them into the bedroom while he changes and I get 15 minutes of peace to actually get dinner on the table.

6:45PM Put kids dinner on the table. Make Raif's plate. Make my plate.

6:50PM I sit down and cut my first bite. "Mommy, I need more broccoli." "Mommy, I need more chicken."

6:55PM Return with more food for the kids. Attempt to eat my first bite.... "Mommy, more milk please." "Mommy, more chicken please."

7:00PM Return with kids food. Attempt to eat first bite.. "Mommy, I am done." "Mommy, I am done." Shovel a couple bites in before the tribe gets restless. Attempt adult conversation with husband - don't get very far.

7:15 PM Upstairs to get ready for bed. Children have regained energy from dinner. Run around naked and have NO desire to go to bed. Wrangle children into pajamas, read story and tuck into bed.

7:45 PM Close doors on children.

7:46PM Feed dogs and clean up kitchen with Raif.

8:15PM Look over the damage from Hurricane Quinn and Greyson. Determine whether I should clean up or collapse on the couch and watch some TV.

8:15-9:00PM Try to be the good mother/wife and clean up some and once again answer correspondence, do laundry and other general to dos around the house.

9:00PM Finally sit down with Raif and share stories of the day as we watch TV. Really want to go to bed but don't because only really geriatric people go to bed this early.

10:00PM Thank God - bedtime. Get ready for bed and curl up under the covers. Turn the monitors on and listen to the angelic sound of my children breathing and forget all the hassle and turmoil of the day and realize that I don't have it that bad.

Colorado survived the Erims...

Last week the whole entire Erim clan descended on Winter Park, CO. We went with my parents as well as our friends Susanna and Keith, their daughter Kinley and Susanna's parents Jim and Lynda (aka Lolly and Pops). We all had an amazing time. Raif, Susanna, Keith and I got to snowboard for 4 days and had some major alone adult time. The kids had a blast with 4 grandparents showering constant attention on them and I think the grandparents had a blast spoiling their grandkids. On our off days we had lots of grand adventures - we went tubing, sledding, and ice skating and even took a sleigh ride through the woods. We made snow angels and threw snowballs and the kids ate lots of snow. We attempted a snowman but Greyson enjoyed jumping in the pile of snow too much to let us finish. We thought about putting Greyson in ski school but he really didn't have a lot of interest so Raif instead took both Quinn and Greyson down a hill on his snowboard - which they loved.

Not to say that we didn't have our share of injuries. My knees still hurt from some skiier who took me out from behind while I was shredding the powder and I have a large bruise on my shin from an unfortunate ski lift incident. Raif managed (only Raif) to tweek his knee on one of our first runs (on a green no less) after his binding ripped right off his board. Then in attempting to do a 180 off a jump he managed to crack a rib. Even our children were not spared. My daughter is apparently a lightening rod for sledders as she got 'smacked down' (her words) 4 times by sledders sliding down the hill and got some pretty nasty snow burn and cuts on her face. But each time she wiped away the tears and wanted to go again. She was braver than I would have been.

We also found someone on the trip who takes more pictures than Raif, if you can believe that!! Susanna's mother and Raif took 1,500 pics between the two of them. Yowzer. I don't think there was a moment of the trip that wasn't photo documented. Here are some of my favorite pictures from the trip - and if you have a lot of time to kill you can view the rest on Raif's smugmug account.
http://sailrace.smugmug.com/gallery/7484689_k7KqP#482977335_Mre2y

Happy Birthday Cooper

Last, last Friday (the 20th) was Cooper's 6th birthday. We left for Colorado that morning so she sort of got gypped out of all her birthday festivities. We did manage to get in her birthday bone (with candle) and an out of tune rendition of Happy Birthday before whisking her off to the pet spa for the week. I am hoping she enjoyed the doggie spa enough to forgive us for missing her birthday.

My Little Packing Helper

And I wonder why nothing seems to be actually getting into the suitcases...

Pre-Vacation Blues

There are several challenges in having children - one of the biggest I have discovered so far is traveling with them. On Friday the Erim clan is heading west to go skiing for a week and so here I am the week before having to pack.

We avoid air travel as much as possible. The first reason being now that Quinn is over two for us to even contemplate going anywhere by plane the price tag starts at $1,000 and only goes up from there. Ouch. Our second reason is, well you know, we love our dogs and so attempt to take them on most of our vacations which requires us to drive. We are the crazy people that would rather drive 14 hours through the night down to Palm Beach to board a plane to the Bahamas than take the 2 hour flight there from Nashville. The third reason is packing. When we drive anywhere I can always throw the extra diapers and an extra bag of toys into the car last minute and no one cares if we have overweight bags or 13 of them, for that matter. And finally, the biggest reason is the whole airline process itself. In driving we schlep the kids into the car in 5 minutes and load the bags and go - the process of getting to the airport of getting all of us and all our crap into the terminal, checked-in, through security and on to the plane without losing a child or a bag is daunting to say the least.

But since our dogs can't ski and since driving to Denver would take like 3 days each way we will be heading to the airport on Friday. Pray for us.

So here I sit procrastinating because the LAST thing I want to do is pack. I can pack myself in about 20 minutes - packing kids on the other hand takes preparation, thought and a whole lot of creativity. We are staying in CO for a week so I have got to pack enough toys to entertain them so they won't destroy a condo but said toys have to be small and compact enough to fit in an overhead bin. I have spent the afternoon inspecting all of our toys seeing if they fit the bill - compact, fun, not too many parts to lose so I am not spending my last day hunting for the lost puzzle piece instead of skiing. I have narrowed the list to the semi-finalists and tonight will have to play puzzle master to see how to get them all into the airline imposed baggage limits. Next I have to think of the plane ride. One of our other caveats in flying is attempting to fly at night (ie bedtime). That way the kids get on the plane, we put them in their jammies and they fall asleep and we then can enjoy the overpriced liquor. However, we couldn't get a night flight out so our 3 hour plane flight is going to be in prime play time. Our seatmates are going to love us!

To top this off I have to do all this packing by myself - Raif is on a business trip til thursday so I have no one to bounce my ideas off or help me sit on a suitcase to shut it. So if any of you have any great plane or packing ideas let me know and hopefully this will all be worth it once we get there.

Well, At Least They Are Honest....

Raif was playing with the kids outside and came in for a minute and when he went outside again he found both of them crying and holding plastic golf clubs...
Raif: What happened?
Quinn: Greyson hit me in the head
Greyson: Quinn hit me on the hand.
Raif: Did you do this on purpose or was it an accident?
Quinn: On purpose
Greyson: On purpose

Happy Valentine's Day

OK, I will be the first to admit that I am a holiday geek. I love holidays and attempt as much as possible to OD on them, much to my husband's dismay. I've got decorations for every holiday and try to craft everything we do around whatever day it is. So here was our Valentine's Day...

We started off with heart shaped pancakes (or at least they were suppose to be. Raif let me sleep in this morning (thanks babe) but he assured me that the pancakes were done as instructed). Then they, of course, wore their coordinating "Daddy's Little Cupcake" and "Wild For Mommy" t-shirts. Our afternoon snack consisted of making heart shaped Jell-O jigglers.

For dinner we had champagne (or sparkling water, depending on who you asked) in wine glasses as well as pink milk and spare ribs with BBQ sauce (the theme being red if you hadn't guessed by now)

Then we had pink frosted cupcakes for dessert and topped the night off with a pink bath and Valentine books.

OK, I am a dork but I think they had fun..... Now on to St. Patrick's Day.