The Erim Family Chronicles: Ties That Bind

I always find it fascinating the different ways that people become friends. Some people you build friendships with slowly over time, like that neighbor you see at the park every week with their kids or the husband/wife of a long time friend. Other times the connection is instant and after one evening out you know you will be friends forever. And sometimes it is circumstances that forever bind you.

Raif and I met Calanit a week after Greyson was born in Northside's preemie support group. Our stories seem to follow a similar path. We both had twins, though she had girls, and we both lost one. While Aydan was stillborn, precious Ilana lost her fight after complications with heart surgery after 10 months in the NICU. We shared the struggle of losing a child and the challenge of raising a preemie with various health issues. When we got together our conversations invariably turned to RSV vaccinations, therapy and growth charts. It was comforting to be able to talk to someone who really understood our issues.

Then our paths became intertwined even more when we got pregnant pretty much at the same time. We held each others hands as we passed through those scary 24-28 week stages and panicked at each little cramp and unfamiliar feeling. And there was no greater cheerleader for the other when we each passed by the 37th week and could consider ourselves 'full term.'

Our visits have been few and far between since we moved to Nashville but we were beyond excited when this past Sunday we actually found a time to get together. We sat in Calanit's kitchen marveling over the miracle's that were playing dress up and cars in the next room and while the conversation did wind its way to the various health issues that they both face the fact that the majority of the time we talked about 'normal' stuff indicates how far both these kids have come.

And while they both will never understand it, this pictures means so much to all of us.