Absence Explained

I am sure that my devoted blog followers (ha) have been wondering if I had fallen off a cliff. Thankfully, no I am still around but A LOT has gone on around here over the last week and a half which has caused me to be horribly neglectful of my blog....

First (and the only good thing) is that I am now gainfully employed (well sort of). I am the Chief Accounting Officer for Raif's company. Now it is a company of 5 people so the title might be a bit overblown but hey I gave it to myself. I am working just a couple hours a week keeping their books in line. It has been good to use my brain in another capacity rather than just Mommydom. It has taken a bit to dust the cobwebs off my accounting knowledge but I think I will enjoy the change of pace and getting out of the house a bit more than I do now.

Now on to the less than wonderful happenings.

Last Friday night as she was walking up the stairs to our porch Cooper hurt her neck. She was in extreme pain all night wincing every time she moved her head. We took her to the vet Saturday morning and the doctor suspected a slipped disk in her neck and sent us to a canine neurologist the following Monday. She did a CT scan (cha-ching) of her neck and also her leg (which she has been having issues with for awhile now). Cooper does indeed have a slipped disk in her neck though not severe enough to have surgery on, which I suppose is good news. We are suppose to give her anti-inflammatories when she hurts it and if the episodes get more frequent she may need to have surgery in the future. Sweet. However, the orthopedist looked at the pics from her leg and told us she did need to have surgery on her knee. So Friday Cooper had reconstructive knee surgery. She has to be completely immobile for the next 8 weeks - literally only getting up to go outside to do her business and come back in. She is pretty miserable right now but I think the pain killers are keeping her zoinked out enough not to really notice. Poor baby. The kids have been showering her with toys and pillows and blankets and pictures. It really is sweet though I do think about half the time Cooper would prefer to be left alone.

And finally, what has been keeping me occupied the most over the last week and a half is Greyson. As you may remember last year about this time Greyson had a grand mal seizure. The doctors initially thought it was a febrile seizure but just to be safe they did an EEG which came back abnormal. Our neurologist recommended we put Greyson on anti-seizure medication at that time. After much consideration we decided not to medicate him due to the risks of medicating him and the hope that despite the abnormal EEG that perhaps the episode was a simple febrile seizure which children outgrow.

For the past year we have been watchful and more than a bit worried whenever he got the sniffles but he appeared to be doing great, until last week. That Thursday while having breakfast he had a petit mal seizure (also known as an absence seizure). While this wasn't as severe as his first seizure it was obviously not good news. After alerting his school about what happened the school nurse talked to all his teachers and then informed me that they think he may have had another petit mal seizure that Wednesday. Two seizures in two days was even more of a concern and so we consulted both our neurologist and pediatrician.

We have the best pediatrician and after sitting with him for over an hour and a half last Friday (he talked to us AFTER his office was closed - that is dedication to his job) talking through our concerns we made the decision to medicate Greyson.

Our decision was not an easy one as both options are miserable. Without medication there is a good chance his seizures will increase in frequency and intensity. While the seizure itself is harmless there is a risk of aspiration and falls during the seizure. Additionally, in some cases, the abnormal brain waves associated with the seizures can lead to the brain not forming correctly which we potentially wouldn't find out about until years later when the damage couldn't be undone.

On the flip side, the side effects of the medication include drowsiness, irritability, rage, loss of personality and clumsiness. While the medication they have suggested has been around several years there haven't been long term studies on its effect on the brain and long term brain development. What we do know is that in some cases the medicine does help to change the development of the brain in a way that allows some people to get off of the medicine after a few years.

Like I said - neither choice is a good one.

Our doctor has given us a 50/50 chance that someday he will be able to get off the medicine and we will be giving him annual EEGs to see if his brain function is returning to normal.

When you make the choice to become a parent you never realize and honestly no one can prepare you to make these kind of choices for your child. Choices that could potentially affect their personality and in essence their soul. This last week and a half has been a very painful and gut wrenching period for both Raif and I. I can't tell you how many 'what if' scenarios have gone through my head in the wee hours of the night when all I have with me our my own thoughts and fears. I just hope we have made the right decision.

So we are taking things a day at a time around here and trying to get back into a normal routine. Hopefully the joy of the holiday season will help brighten things up around here and perhaps soon I can start posting about random inconsequential moments in life.

Thanks to all of you (you know who you are) who have been my shoulder to cry on over the past week and my sounding board for one of our most difficult decisions. Your friendship is invaluable.

And now off to paint some decorations for the tree with my children.